As a former attendee of a LEGALISTIC "Christian" Church and College

the way I see it.......
We are all on our individual journeys and ANYTHING that happens to us comes through the hands of God first. Because I BELIEVE that, I can accept good and bad, anything bad encourages me to draw closer to God and makes me stronger. Anything good, blesses me and I am grateful.
I can look at ANY church or any person that hurts me with their harshness or messed up mentality and attitudes and realize that I can 'LIVE out Jesus' to them because I realize that they are ALSO in their journey and just haven't LEARNED the correct expression of" love and truth" yet. Iit is (partly) MY job, as a follower of Christ, to exemplify it. They will learn MORE by experiencing 'love and truth" than by any other way.
On the other side of the coin, any hurt they inflict upon ME also helps ME to be better, stronger. It's NOT FUN but it sure allows for greater growth which is so important.
When a person stops growing, the hurt they inflict upon themselves is pretty much enough to destroy themselves.... that is Satan's favorite, secret weapon, to destroy a person from the inside out. :(
The "Church" of God needs to be firm, strong and stand up for righteousness in LOVE and TRUTH..... how much more effective we willl be. And it's happening. I see it. People are getting it together and choosing to live in accordance to Jesus' "spiritual kingdom rules" :) I'm so happy I'm not alone in my journey in trying to live out "truth in love". But even if I was, I would still do it. Because I KNOW it's TRUE and that it has endless value. And I SO appreciate others as they forgive my shortcomings and ignorance. It's a merciful dynamic.
I think it's important to recognize that "Christian" churches ARE important, no matter what, no matter which denomination.Some MAY be screwed up and focus on things that are ridiculous BUT if it draws people to the Almighty God, in their continual search to grow and know MORE about God, they WILL FIND the greater truth. .... which is God's heart - HIS truth.
The journey can be hard though- but He has provided ALL that we need to get to His presence.
Seek the TRUTH -- you WILL find it.
Follow what His spirit reveals to you.
Stay the course.
Grant mercy.

It's a hard fight but definitely WORTH every step :)

Semper fidelis~

P.S. It IS fun to recount stories of our more "immature" days though :) It reaffirms that we HAVE grown up a little.... I laugh at the stories now... we ALL have them and for the most part share them in good humor (tho' some in flabbergasted disbelief!)
I think this discussion board is good..... to come together to "spill it out " Especially if certain events are still causing pain or bitterness. The goal is for a person to gain encouragement- to be allowed to get the 'crap' out -so they can be healthier and grow stronger.

I have a pair of coulottes - as a momento....when I have something bad and want to purge it from my system, I wear them and it works like Syrup of Ipecac.
-- THAT's WHAT I'm talking about!!!!! :)


thus ends my preaching for today. :)